For some of us, money signifies freedom and security. For others, it can be a source of shame and pain. Regardless of our financial situations, we all internalize ideas, attitudes, opinions, and perceptions about what it means to have, or not to have money. The emotions money triggers, the rules we create around it, how we believe it should be used, and the role it plays in our lives make up what we call financial identity.

For much of my life, I have rarely stopped to consider where my natural resources came from. When I turned on the faucet, water would run. When I switched on the lights, there was electricity. So long as I paid my bills on time, like magic, I could expect a hot shower. I rarely gave thought to the power plant or reservoir, or the people working behind the scenes to make this happen. And I didn’t often consider whether these resources would be available for my grandchildren, or those thereafter.

Challenging conversations have the power to shift potential energy into kinetic energy. By discussing complex or controversial topics, we put our values and ideas into motion and create a pathway for change. When conducted with empathy and mutual respect, they can deepen our relationships and make us feel more connected to our community.